“With women, men tend to look for things they can “fix” which keeps them from being able to simply listen to a woman’s concerns or ideas.”

 

 

 


  • Women are expecting more from men today in marriage and are increasingly the ones to file for divorce when the marriage is not satisfactory.

 

  • Many men feel inadequate to deal with the new expectations placed on them. They are frustrated, possibly even surprised to learn that being a good provider is not nearly enough.

 

  • Males have been culturally conditioned early in life to place little emphasis on relationship development and maintenance.

 

  • Some men, often in their 40s, have lost their zest for life and are disillusioned, feeling isolated and spiritually empty. This is usually called “mid-life crisis.”

 

  • Work tends to crowd out most other things in life for many men, leaving little room for other interests and/or self-development.

 

  • Some men have a fatalistic view of their situation because they do not believe they are able to fix the complex problems they are facing in their personal lives.

 

  • Most of us inherited our view of women from our father, and our father likely did the same. So our view of women may be out-of-date by two generations.

 

  • Many men withhold their feelings from their partner because they feel she needs protection, or she cannot handle the feelings, or because they want to avoid the conflict that may arise if they make their feelings known.

 

  • When he feels like a failure in his relationship with his partner, a man might resort to drug or alcohol abuse, use of pornography, or womanizing.

 

  • Failing to treat women appropriately can be a real problem in the workplace and can sometimes cost a man his job or marriage or both.

 

  • By the age of seven, boys have begun a trend of paying less attention to relationships and less interaction with girls.

 

  • Anger seems to be the main male emotion acceptable in ourculture. Therefore, it gets overused and other emotions are less developed.

 

  • Men may be less equipped than women to negotiate workable, peaceable solutions to issues. The cultural expectation that they appear strong may be a factor.

 

  • In relationships with women, men tend to look for things they can “fix” which keeps them from being able to passively and empathically listen to a woman’s concerns or ideas.

 

  • Lack of proficiency in relationship building and maintenance can make life difficult for men on the job and at home.

 

  • The model of masculinity that we subscribe to is likely to get passed down to our sons.

 

  • Men are more likely than women to resist counseling or seek other support.

 

  • Because men shy away from opening up and sharing with other men, they typically have few close male relationships to provide support when they need it.

 

  • Being stuck in an out-of-date view of masculinity can keep us from being our best selves in relationships or careers.

 

  • Many men consider themselves to be inadequate in a conversation with their partner because they feel their spouse is more articulate.
  • Sometimes our preoccupation with acquiring “stuff” and fascination with toys can create distance in relationships as well as skewed priorities.

 

  • Men may feel spiritually empty because they have ignored opportunities to help others or “get outside themselves” in other ways.

 

  • Men and women typically have very different views of intimacy. This can create distance between them and confusion about roles.

 

  • Relationships can be very successful even if there are major differences.

 

  • Erectile dysfunction drugs may fail to work if there are overriding relationship problems.

 

  • Our definition of manliness and masculinity can prevent us from having truly intimate connection with our partner and children.

 

  • Women seem to be paying more attention to self-development than men. For the first time in history, more women than men are graduating from college.

 

  • As men, we tend to become overly focused on work and career at the expense of family and relationships. A third of men consider themselves workaholics, based on the Men in BalanceTM survey.

 

  • Sometimes as men we value independence at the expense of close relationships. This can leave us feeling isolated and alone.

 

  • As men, we may have difficulty hearing and acting on feedback, especially from our partner. Failing to factor in our partner’s concerns can create problems in a marriage or intimate relationship.

 

  • As men, we are usually taught to be competitors at an early age. For the most part, this works well in sports and career but can be a disaster in personal relationships.

 

  • Unless there are problems at work, most men have probably never studied their communication style so their partner’s feedback on the topic may come as a surprise.

 

  • Churches can benefit from committed male involvement in truly significant roles. Men need to take the initiative in asserting themselves into their place of worship.

 

  • There are some well-established rules about interpersonal communication that we can learn to reduce conflict in marriage.